D-Day

Well it looks like I have the night locked in as my first as a man of no fixed address - tonight, Friday the 5th of March. I am planning to head out on the town and unless some young lady, or ladies, with obviously much lower standards than I, take/s me home, that will mark night one of homelessness. In saying that, maybe I do need to lower my standards if I am hoping to use this as a way of finding a bed on the weekends...

The ute is still located in the visitor parking area of Langlands Close Apartments - my prior accommodation. I will have to move it somewhere else past tonight, so they don't cotton onto my devious plans.

A few people have questioned the legality of my plan, and to tell you the truth, it isn't that well documented. I have read all the documentation and regulations on the Queensland Transport, QPS and BCC websites, and there is nothing there that spells things out too clearly. I think I will be fine. I am not planning to 'live' on the streets like these champions. In yet another tick for the pro column of my plan, it appears BCC provide free haircuts to homeless people! Hope they do colours, foils and scalp massages to ensure my patronage. I bet you council rate paying lemmings don't get services like this...

Some questions keep coming up, so I thought a quick FAQ might be in order.

• Toilets / Showers: I have a shower every morning at work in air-conditioned luxury - this will not change. Funnily enough, we are also furnished with toilets at work. I am sure I can co-ordinate my toileting habits to cater for this.


• Food: I don't do breakfast in any case, and consider a brew from Glen's Espresso, my breakfast each morning anyway. No I won't be dining out every night for dinner either. I can work something out in the office kitchenette late afternoon for an early dinner each day.


• Entertainment: I am planning to use the BCC library and working longer hours to kill the time. I might also spend more time on the bike. I don't intend to get back to the ute each night until late when it is a bit quieter and my comings and goings are less conspicuous. The ute is simply a place to sleep, not a place to hangout. Wireless internet on my mobile phone should facilitate those times I can't fall straight to sleep.


• Location: A couple of my dear, and well meaning cousins, have suggested I work my way through the alphabet from A to Z, staying in a different suburb every night. I was considering it, but it seems like too much work, and I am pretty careful about where I leave my ute in any case. I am also not too sure I am quite that adventurous when you consider the options for the letter 'D'...


• Security: Really, who is going to get the bigger fright? My goodself, or some dirty shadow lurking, thieving farker poking their head into the back of the tray? I am sure they won't hang around to exchange niceties once they realise there is someone in the tray.

God bless to all - see you on the street.